| Name | # | Abs? | Goalie? | G | A | P | PIM | GA | W | L | T |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Name | # | Abs? | Goalie? | G | A | P | PIM | GA | W | L | T |
| Ryan Adams | 31 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Matthew Rochna | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Andrew Gates | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Tim Alderman | 18 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Michael Akins | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Joe Korepta | 13 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Spencer Blatt | 16 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Jeremy Ruggiero | 27 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Ed Rose | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Sean Kenney | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Jim Tassis | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||
| Galaxies Subs | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
Ohhhh here we go, you know, beer league playoffs—THIS is hockey. Not this, you know, TikTok hockey, everybody filming themselves, “oh look at my edgework”—EDGEWORK?? You know what my edgework was? Falling down and blaming the ice. That’s character.
So Galaxies vs Mariners, you know, bottom seeds—real blue-collar matchup. This is like if two extras from Slap Shot got cut and started their own league. I love it. No superstars, just vibes and cholesterol.
Galaxies come in, you know, two-game win streak, thinking they’re New York Islanders. Relax. It’s three games, not a dynasty, it’s a coincidence.
Game starts—NINETEEN seconds—DOLEGA. Coast to coast. Through FIVE GUYS. Five! You know, that’s not defense, that’s one of those ropes at the airport, you just zig-zag through. Nobody touches him! What is this, a meet-and-greet? You got guys out there like “oh wow, nice move, sir.” HIT HIM! This isn’t a yoga class!
1-0 Mariners and the Galaxies look like they just got unfriended in real life. Nobody talking, nobody moving. You know, everybody’s probably thinking about their fantasy teams or whatever—fantasy! I had a fantasy once, you know, thought I was gonna open a chain of sports bars, call it “Uncle’s Place”—yeah, well, turns out you gotta show up consistently, who knew?
First period, total mess. Puck bouncing around like it’s got anxiety. Passing? Forget it. It’s like watching people try to pair Bluetooth—“is it connected?? I don’t know!” You know, everything used to just WORK. Now you need an app to tie your skates.
But then—late in the period—they figure it out. Blatt, Rochna, 2-on-1—BOOM—tie game. Nice play. Simple. No analytics, no iPad on the bench, just “hey go there, I’ll pass it.” Revolutionary!
Second period—this is where the universe goes sideways, you know. The REP scores. The rep! That’s like if the substitute teacher dunked on you. From the POINT! Kenney feeds it, Alderman sets a screen—big guy, you know, just standing there like Jabba the Hutt—and Sale? Didn’t see a thing. Could’ve been a meteor.
2-1 Galaxies. At this point I’m questioning reality.
Then—OH HERE WE GO—technology. Scoreboard dies. Gone. Blank. You know, all these wires and screens and updates—“we updated the system!” Yeah? To WHAT? Silence?? Back when things broke, at least a guy named Frank hit it with a wrench and you kept going.
Everyone’s standing around. Refs guessing. “33 seconds.” Why 33?? Larry Bird. Now there's a real athlete. Thirteen seconds later—ALDERMAN. 3-1. Mariners are like “wait a minute—” NOPE! That’s life, you know. Sometimes the clock just… disappears. I had a whole decade like that.
Third period—Gates makes it 4-1. That’s it. Mariners are done. Mentally at the bar already. Probably arguing about who forgot to bring the orange slices.
And then—ahh, you know—Lefevre goes down late. Shoulder. Bad spill. And suddenly it’s not funny. That’s the thing, you know, one minute you’re out there thinking you’re Wayne Gretzky, next minute you’re Googling “can you sleep sitting up.” Hope he’s alright. Seriously.
Final—Galaxies win. Three in a row. Good for them. Ride it while it lasts, you know? Everything’s temporary. Momentum, knees, friendships… I had a boat once—well, not mine exactly, I knew a guy—
Anyway!
Next up—the Marauders.
OHHH, that’s trouble. That’s not a team, that’s like running into The Terminator in a dark alley. Galaxies better wake up. You can’t be letting guys walk through five players like it’s a mall on Black Friday. Play defense! Communicate! Put the phones down!
Nobody listens.
Good game though. Real good game.
| Name | # | Abs? | Goalie? | G | A | P | PIM | GA | W | L | T |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Name | # | Abs? | Goalie? | G | A | P | PIM | GA | W | L | T |
| Brendan Caldwell | 1 | 0 | |||||||||
| Tom LeFevre | 22 | 0 | |||||||||
| Brett McKenzie | 21 | 0 | |||||||||
| Geoff Seeley | 5 | 0 | |||||||||
| Roderic Dolega | 2 | 0 | |||||||||
| James Konstantino | 14 | 0 | |||||||||
| Joe Baker | 3 | 0 | |||||||||
| Nathan Radl | 4 | 0 | |||||||||
| Ryan Jones | 13 | 0 | |||||||||
| Bret Malone | 33 | 0 | |||||||||
| Chuck Ginman | 17 | 0 | |||||||||
| Mariners Subs | 0 | 0 |